Celebrate Recovery Blog

Here at CR Saddleback, we ask our Leaders to introduce themselves with this statement: “Hi my name is _______; I am a believer who struggles with________.”  We ask our leaders to keep it short; to stick to one or two primary areas of recovery.  We ask them not to state a host of recovery issues and character defects, etc… especially because we do not run recovery specific groups for character defects.  Come to think of it, in this body, I don’t think I will ever gain a year of sobriety from “pride.”  With that standard, I would never qualify to lead a group for pride. J 

Each Leader has an opportunity to share about all their areas of recovery and character defects in their small groups and certainly when they share their testimonies.  It is important that our Leaders set the example for our participants.  Although we cannot control how participants introduce themselves, each participant should state their area of recovery. If they don’t, other group members will feel awkward and unsafe to express their own.  At the very least, a newcomer may say, “Hi my name is _____, and I’m exploring this area of recovery.”

So why do we introduce ourselves to begin with?  As I was writing this blog, Pastor John Baker walked by my desk, so I asked him, “John, why do we introduce ourselves in this way?”  He said, “If I ever forget my struggles, and the pain and destruction they caused, I am more prone to repeat them.  It humbles me.  It helps me remember what Christ has done for me.”

So we introduce ourselves as believers because our identity is in Jesus Christ. We identify our struggles so that we don’t repeat them, and to offer hope to those struggling with the same issues.  Our introductions bring us closer together as a group by establishing accountability and strengthening our fellowship.

Tina Davis

National Training Coach

Keeping Fellowship Safe

As Ministry leaders, we are responsible for ensuring that all participants are safe.  More often we think about keeping our groups safe; but what about our time of fellowship?  Celebrate Recovery is unique in that we offer “issue specific” groups for all areas of recovery.  For some, CR fellowship may be the only reprieve he/she has from living with an active drug addict or alcoholic.  The last thing we want is for someone to come, grab a hamburger at the CR barbeque, and have to sit next to an individual who is under the influence. 

We also want to ensure that the individual, who is under the influence, is safe.  This person could trip; fall down a set of stairs, etc… Additionally, having knowledge that someone is intoxicated and then allowing them to stay on campus may be a potential liability to your church.

Here are a few safety tips to use when you become aware that an individual is under the influence.

Ensure two people are tending to the individual.  These two people must be of the same gender as the intoxicated individual.  Do your best to avoid causing a scene.

• Anyone intoxicated should be calmly escorted away from the mainstream area.
• If necessary, inform your campus security. Campus security is often trained in this area and will be a helpful resource.
• If possible, acquire the individual’s car keys. 
• Offer to call a family member/friend to come pick them up.
• Call for a taxi.
• Offer a cup of coffee and wait with them.
• Get their phone number and give them a call the next day and invite them back to CR.  Recovery is not just about ensuring our CR Group is safe, but also to reach out and welcome others who are hurting.

 In the case the person does not relinquish their car keys:

• If possible, obtain their license plate #.
• Let the individual know you will need to inform the police that a driver, you believe to be under the influence, is operating a vehicle. Hopefully this will deter him/her from driving away. 

Keeping the Chemical Addiction Open Share Group Safe

In the case that an individual is already in a meeting, you may consider allowing her/him to stay.  But they should not be permitted to share.  During the guidelines, make this statement, “if anyone has had anything to drink or use today, to keep the group safe, we ask that you not share this evening.  If he/she is being disruptive, your co-leader should calmly escort him/her out of the group.  (Follow safety tips above)

Keeping mix issue group safe 

Our step studies are mixed area of recovery.  How are those trying to focus on workbook questions, going to feel sitting next to someone who is under the influence?  Here again, how safe does someone feel sitting next to someone who is under the influence?  How will an addict in recovery feel?  Will they feel distracted or have the urge to relapse?  In the case of mixed issue groups, have your co-leader calmly escort the individual outside the group.  (Follow Safety tips above.) 

As you’re deciding on the best way to handle the situation, ask yourself, “Is this current situation helping others feel safe?”   

Bonus Question:

“We have a participant attending CR who is struggling with alcohol. For the last 2 months or so they have found help in another area of recovery, however they relapsed two weeks ago and began drinking again. Recently as a leadership, we have decided to ask those struggling with substance abuse to stay with the substance abuse open share until they have had one year sobriety. Is that appropriate?” 

 REPLY:

Asking participants to attend another group is inappropriate.  CR Participants are free to attend whatever meeting they choose.  It is not our role, as a ministry, to dictate what group we think he/she needs to attend.  However, if a participant asks a leader what group he/she recommends he/she should attend, then by all means, a leader may respond honestly based on their experience.  Hopefully, as in all cases, as individuals are ready, he/she will choose the best group.  In this case, the good news is, this individual is attending CR!

Tina Davis

National Training Coach

At the CR Model our participants enjoy celebrating various lengths of sobriety.   There are clear definitions of sobriety for Chemical Addiction, Sexual Addiction, Anger, Food Addiction, and Eating Disorders. There are many other areas of recovery that do not have a clear definition of sobriety; for example Co-dependency and Hurts, Hang-ups and Habits.  They all get to celebrate.

For co-dependency groups such as Adult Children of Alcoholic’s/Family Dysfunction, Co-Dependent in a Relationship with a Sexual Addicted Man, and Co-dependency; consider a definition of sobriety based on the solution.  For example:

The Solution:

Actively attended Large Group

Actively participated in Open Share Group 

Has a sponsor

Has accountability partner(s)

Actively participated in a Step Study Group (when available)

Active in CR Service

(Add additional items unique to your particular area of recovery. Be sure to keep it simple.)

These types of actions are evidence of recovery for those who struggle with co-dependency.  In addition, most people know in their hearts when they have lost their sobriety.  Often, it’s our very heart’s convictions that tell us when we need to change our sobriety date. I truly believe that individuals who are no longer in Denial, who are working an honest program, know in their hearts when they have relapsed.  Step 10 says, “We continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it. “So if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t all? (1 Corinthians 10:12)

True sobriety starts at the beginning of your recovery journey.  If you’re not working a program you need to ask yourself are you really sober.  For example; an alcoholic or addict who stops drinking or using will continue in their symptomatic behavior if they’re not working a program. Real sobriety is evident by the steady progress that comes from working the principles one day at a time.

We don’t have to be experts on each area of recovery.  The bible clearly states “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23).  Matthew 5:19 says, “Anyone who breaks one of the least of these commandments and teach others to do the same will be called least in the kingdom of heaven, but whoever practices and teaches these commands will be called great in the kingdom of heaven”  The good news is the gospel of Jesus Christ.  Surrendering our will and lives over to the care of Jesus on a daily basis is true lasting sobriety!

For a copy of our definitions of sobrieties, feel free to email me at, tinad@saddleback.com.

God Bless,

Tina Davis

National Training Coach